The wonderful Nicole Korsakas with her sons Lorenzo (12) and Corinthian (7). She is also mom to Rosie (pictured - still born March 20, 2014). Nicole had her first son when she was just 17. She didn't know what to expect and gained a lot of weight due to eating whatever she wanted and had to be induced 3 weeks early due to Preeclampsia. Her labor was very long and she ended up delivering her son vaginally after about 30 hours. She was more careful the second time around and knew that any weight she gained beyond baby weight was hers to keep. With Corinthian she went two weeks post dates and she was induced with a Foley bulb. Her water broke in the middle of the night, she went back to the hospital to labor and was dilated to a 10 within just a few hours and pushed for an hour or so. She was then told they'd decided to perform a cesarean but she doesn't feel they allowed her to continue or try alternative positions. When she got pregnant with her third she knew she wanted a VBAC and requested her medical records, it was then she saw the doctors note that the cesarean was medically necessary due to "Difference in the size of patient and the size of the child's father" because her partner was 6' 8" and she is 4' 11" the fact they assumed the baby would be too big when he was just 6 lbs at 2 weeks over due was upsetting to her. She said that she feels, when a baby is forced to leave before they're ready, they aren't going to come easy which is just what happened to her son.
Her third pregnancy was smooth and she knew what she was doing. She switched providers to have her VBAC and got to her 20 week appointment without complication. Right around her 26th week, Nicole came across Paula Gillis' story on the 4th Trimester Bodies Project Instagram account. It was then that she realized she hadn't felt her baby move. She went in to see the doctor and they couldn't find the heartbeat. They then did an ultrasound and she learned her baby had passed away. She then took a day and got a pedicure, had her sister take maternity pictures for her, and did everything she could to enjoy her last moments of pregnancy. She went to the hospital the next day to deliver her daughter. She was given cytotec to induce labor and the following day, she was able to have her VBAC, delivering her daughter vaginally in the breech position with her partner and sister's support. Nicole says that even though she knew her daughter wasn't alive the instinct to mother her was still there and she was able to hold her and rock her and have those moments with her. Rosie stayed with her until the following day when she was ready to say goodbye. The autopsy was inconclusive and Nicole had hoped that something there would bring her answers and peace. She dropped some clothes off at the funeral home and begged the lady to see her daughter, she wasn't allowed to because of the autopsy and Nicole felt angry that it robbed her from not seeing her again though she now knows it was for the best she remember her daughter as she was born. Nicole is hoping that her participation in this project allows her story to come full circle and that another woman is able to connect with her for support and identification as others supported her.