Somer Myers (37), Ever (6), and Olive (3)
Pennsylvania | Photographed in Detroit, MI
Somer shares -
"I had an abortion over 16 years ago. I wasn't ready for a child and definitely wasn't adult enough to become a mom. When I was going through the abortion I told myself I'd never put myself in that situation again. Not only was it physically painful, the emotional toll it took on me was hard. I felt ashamed and because of that, I didn't confide in anyone. It took my over 10 years to talk about it and although it's not something I bring up, it's also something I am no longer ashamed of. It was my choice and my choice alone.
I've always had body image issues. Having kids and watching my body transform was a hard but beautiful experience. I struggled with losing weight and was really hard on myself. I would pinch parts of my body I hated and I would say horrible things to myself in the mirror. I was obsessed with weighing myself multiple times a day. I sought out therapy and I've been going for over a year now. I no longer weigh myself. In fact, my scale doesn't even work anymore. I no longer pinch my body nor do I speak so horribly to myself. Don't get me wrong, I still struggle, but having two daughters reminds me to be kind to myself. The thought of either of them doing what I did to myself brings me to tears. I would never want them to value themselves on their body alone. There is so much more to a human than just a number.
I had really bad postpartum depression with Olive. We were going through a lot at the time. My mother in law had passed months earlier and Olive was a colicky baby. I remember loving her but not wanting to be with her. I felt like a milk machine. I finally went to my doctors and broke down crying. I was embarrassed that I felt that way. I remember going in and saying "I just want to put her in her crib and turn the music up really loud so I don't hear her." I had a hard time asking for help. I'm so thankful my doctor listened to me and guided me through the journey. And of course she is a wonderful 3 year old and sleeps 12 hours a night now!
My first born has Down syndrome. We found out half way through that our baby might have Down Syndrome. I bawled in the office. I cried harder that day than when my own mother passed. I was so scared and I knew nothing about DS therefore I projected what I had only seen in movies or heard about. When Ever came into the world I immediately knew that she had DS. The almond shaped eyes, the petite nose. That moment though, that's when I knew it would be okay. I had been so laser focused on the diagnosis that I forgot that she would be a baby and look like a baby. I know that seems so stupid, but it's true. I was so scared she wouldn't have friends, or be, well, "typical". But let me tell you that sister friend is everything and more. She and Olive, her sister, are exactly what I imagined siblings would be like. I look at Ever and see that I had it all wrong. My husband and I advocate for both our girls to make sure that they are treated with respect and treated fairly. All we want is to make sure that they are given the chance to succeed.