Kimberly Grossmann (36), Lucas (4), Jamie (3), and Alex (1)
Kimberly is a previous project participant. You can view her original photo and story from 2015 here.
Kimberly shares -
“I have had a distorted body image of myself since I was very young and struggled with eating disorders since I was 16. Pregnancy has changed my body in ways that are still difficult for me, but I try to stay healthy and positive for my kids. I would never want them to talk to themselves the way I have always talked to myself and I want to be a good example of what its like to have a positive body image and also a healthy relationship with food. I still struggle with this at times, but am also able to be proud of all that my body has accomplished and what it is capable of. I exclusively pumped for a year for Lucas, and then nursed Jamie for 3 years (10 months tandem nursing with Alex), and am currently nursing Alex at 13 months. I also grew these three incredible little guys. All of that makes my new body worth it.
After my first son, Lucas, I struggled with PPD. I was fairly new to California and hadn't really made any friends yet, so it was easy to isolate myself. I felt like I was walking around in a fog. I wasn't able to breastfeed Lucas and was pumping for him around the clock and feeding through an SNS for the first 3 weeks and then with a bottle. I was really hard on myself and emotional because of it. These feelings of sadness and isolation lasted for about 5 months until I connected with a group of moms which really helped.
I had a much easier time after the birth of my second son, Jamie. I still struggled with some anxiety, which is normal for me, but in comparison it was so much better than what I felt after Lucas. After the birth of my third son, Alex, I expected to feel fine again but ended up having a very difficult time with PPD for about 3 months. This time I felt really sad and had a lot of social anxiety. As a result withdrew from my closest friends for awhile. Luckily my friends and family were really supportive which helped me get through it.
Learning to love myself has been a process that my children have made easier for me. I participated in 2015 with Lucas and Jamie, and wanted to participate again with Alex.”