Jayk Kearns (20) and Oliver
Jayk shares -
“I experienced an early miscarriage at 4 weeks. I had only been with my partner for two months at the time but we both took it very hard. I was getting positive tests for a week, then I started bleeding so I rushed to urgent care, tests in hand. The doctor said I wasn’t pregnant, and refused to do any testing and just sent me home. The next few weeks were spent crying.
Since coming out as transgender I’ve always disliked my body, but when I found out I was pregnant I felt really good about my body. Partially because my belly never got big and people couldn’t tell I was pregnant! After I had my son I lost all the baby weight fast but when I went back on hormones they forced me to take the depo shot ( a form of birth control), that combined with my hormones has made me gain all the baby weight back and I can’t loose it.
I tried to chest feed and it was amazing at first. My milk came in fast, while still in the hospital. In the weeks following, I had got mastitis twice, the later one sent me to the ER with prolonged 105°f fevers, they thought I had sepsis but luckily I was given antibiotics and allowed to go home. I lost my milk supply shortly after that and I couldn’t stop crying. Thing adjusted better once my son was on formula.
I acquired postpartum anxiety and I still have it, I get these crazy thoughts that someone will hurt my son and it gets me depressed. I didn’t really expect anything that has happened to happen but I have lived and learned from it and it has made me stronger.
I feel like transgender parents need more recognition and people need to learn the truth about us and our point of view - we are not freaks, we are normal people who want to start families and live our lives just like everyone else.”