Jill O'Brien (33 - 24 weeks pregnant with Ulysses), Nola (3.5 years), Oona (22 months)
Photographed in Richmond, VA
Jill shares -
"I miscarried my first pregnancy at 9 weeks. I had an ultrasound at 8 weeks, and we saw the baby's heartbeat and it was amazing and sad all at the same time, because the baby was measuring 6 weeks, and the heartbeat was not as fast as it should have been. Next followed one of the longest weeks of my life, waiting for the follow up ultrasound. The ultrasound confirmed the heart had stopped and I passed the baby later that evening. I try to be very open about my miscarriage, because i don't think women should have to carry this secret sadness and I never even thought of it as a possibility when I found out I was pregnant.
Everything is softer and bigger now, and sometimes it is hard to get adjusted to this new version of my body. Especially being pregnant it is hard to hear so many comments about my size. On the other hand, I am in awe of how strong and capable my body is. I've made and grown two amazing humans, and nourished them with my body and I'm growing a third that I can't wait to meet.
With my first daughter, I had concerning lab results during my pregnancy, and had a lot of extra monitoring and ended up with a failed induction and cesarean. All of that plus my previous miscarriage made me a pretty anxious first time mother. Becoming a mother was equal parts magical and painful. I felt like I was born again and loved this little being so much that it was painful. I would vividly see all the ways she could get hurt or die, in my mind. Looking back, I know I should have gotten help. Meeting my second daughter was completely different. I was able to successfully VBAC. I fell in love with her slowly, instead of all at once and was much less anxious.
I've loved seeing beauty in all different types of bodies and wanted a chance to see that beauty in myself."