Victoria Williams (33 - she/her), Saniya (14), Shiloh (4), Skylar (1)
New Orleans, LA
“We had a miscarriage after our second child, but I never fully processed it.
How has parenthood impacted your body image?
Honestly, this is the heaviest I've been in my life. Being a teen parent I experienced that first baby snap back. Then, I was placed on Depo birth control shot and gained weight that felt impossible to lose. Once I got off Depo, I was able to lose 40lbs over the course of 4 years and managed to keep it off until I gave birth to my second child 9 years later. Although I anticipated some weight gain with my second and third pregnancy, I never thought that I would be this weight with this body.
What was your postpartum experience?
My birth experience impacted my postpartum experience. My first birth experience, I felt alone, afraid, and left to take care of a tiny human who I didn't get to meet in the first few hours of her life because of an emergency c-section. Second pregnancy, I felt empowered support by my partner and family. I also felt disappointed because I had another c-section. Immediately after giving birth I experienced baby blues but that faded. Third pregnancy, I felt supported but deflated because I couldn't have the birth I desired. I wanted to push but that doctor who I thought would be on my side was not. This doctor was black; I expected her to be considerate and supportive of my decision to push. She was neither. I was also stuck between the joy of having a baby and feeling saddened that my mother- in- law was dying at the same time. Each time I thought I would experience this immediate burst of joy and happy tears that you frequently see happening after birth.
What is one piece of knowledge you'd pass along to your former self, or a new parent?
To my former self, "this is all a process;" We live, We learn and then we pass our lessons on. Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself; be vulnerable with your partner and allow him to help me through the issues.
Why did you choose to participate in this movement and share your story?
I came here today to embrace my body, in this stage, at this time, and in this season.