The amazing Ashley Martell with her sons Ezekial James (25) and Ahijah Beloved (1). She conceived her first son when she was just 18. She was a single mother and a college student and was grateful to have the help of her own mom in helping raise her son. Because she was so young, she doesn’t feel she had many choices in the process of her pregnancy and birth. Thankfully, she had a healthy pregnancy and very typical hospital birth - but it left her feeling as if there were more to the experience and she looked forward to having more children and more choices in future experiences. Ezekial was a big healthy baby and a voracious nurser, though Ashley says she weaned a bit earlier than she’d have liked due to pressure from social norms at the time. Ashley always wanted to create a large family, with siblings, for Zeke but that was not to be their story. Other conceptions ended in miscarriage, the most recent in 2012. Ashley has some uterine issues including fibroids and at one point was told that she shouldn't try to conceive again because she couldn't sustain another pregnancy. She had only known Ahijah’s father for a couple of weeks prior to conceiving again at age 43 but they believed that the pregnancy was a great gift so decided to face the risks involved. Her pregnancy was much more challenging this time around due to her age and health, and emotional issues within her relationship and family. And though she had dreamt and planned for a very holistic and natural birth, by the third trimester, it looked like her fibroids were pushing her plans in a more medical direction. A few weeks before her due date Ashley’s doctor confirmed that a fibroid was blocking her cervix which would make a vaginal delivery very risky. Because the baby's head was in position behind the fibroid, there was a high probability of uterine prolapse if she were to go into labor. So she shifted gears and a complicated surgical delivery was scheduled. The fear of surgery and it's risks, and the very real possibility that it would result in a hysterectomy, was almost too much to handle in her last month of what she knew would be her last pregnancy. She was grateful to have the support of a Sacred Birthing group, a couple of amazing midwives and her friends and family, who did a lot of spiritual work to help her prepare. Ashley went in for a final ultrasound 8 days before her scheduled delivery to map the fibroids for surgery, and amazingly her doctor discovered the fibroid had moved completely out of the way and gave Ashley the go ahead to try for a vaginal delivery with her midwife. Bewildered but ecstatic, she shifted emotional gears once more, re-visited her sacred birth plan and went into labor without any intervention the day after the surgery would've taken place. Ashley and Ahijah’s father spent the morning of the birth resting at his home in the woods, then drove the hour to her home to check in with their doula, stopping for ice cream and pizza along the way. After a soak in a warm tub Ashley was anxious to be at the birth center and could tell it was almost time. They arrived at the hospital in the last stages of labor, ahead of her midwife and doula, and about 45 minutes later Ahijah was born. Ahijah was very thin at birth and being a preferential nurser and a bit of a picky eater, he's remained lean, but he's healthy and she’s looking forward to allowing him to nurse as long as he chooses.
Ashley spoke greatly about the differences in birthing and nursing her sons more than two decades apart. From the changes in medical climate to the baby gadgets and gizmos available and even more so the difference in feeling like an uninformed girl herself with her first to a woman with experience and wisdom with her second. The bond between her boys as siblings as well as with her as their mama is pure strength.
Fibroids
Sarah Zdanis
The wonderful Sarah Zdanis with her daughter Ella (22 months). Sarah is currently 37 weeks pregnant with baby number two. It took two years of trying to get pregnant before Sarah learned that she had several large fibroids blocking her tubes. She had to have a myomectomy to remove the fibroids which had also caused siatica. In the end it took a total of 3-4 years once the fibroids were removed and the siatica had gone away for Sarah to get pregnant with Ella. She got pregnant very quickly after she got the all clear and had a healthy, easy pregnancy with Ella. With her myomectomy's she wasn't allowed to have a vaginal delivery due to concerns for her uterus. She delivered via cesarean without complication and the delivery and recovery went well. It only took about 3 months to conceive her second. Ella was breastfed until she started to bite and chew and weaned herself just after a year. Sarah continued to pump and give her milk until about 16 months, pumping every two hours around the clock to keep up her supply. She admits that she isn't exactly looking forward to that with this second baby but her daughter is so healthy and happy she's more than willing to do it again. She says she's proud of herself even though it was challenging. Sarah says that being a woman can be very difficult and she wants her children to appreciate their bodies and what they can do. She says that women have super powers, they create beautiful lives and it's very important for our children to see us appreciate ourselves for where we are right now.
Kimberly Daly
The beautiful Kimberly Daly with her daughter Saoirse (20 months) and baby #2 on the way in just a couple weeks. Her first pregnancy ended in miscarriage at 9 weeks and was very devastating. Kimberly had morning sickness every day and felt that even though she wasn't showing, her body had already become that of a mother. She felt guilty as if there was something she could have done differently and wondered if she'd taken good enough care of herself. It took about 18 months to get pregnant with Saoirse once they started trying. The pregnancy was very tough and she ended up developing fibroids, including a large tumor in her stomach that was causing issues and needed to come out. The decision was made to deliver her daughter via cesarean so they could attempt to remove the tumor at the same time. The surgery was very risky as it had grown roots into her uterus. The OB team delivered her daughter and then the surgical teams switched out to remove the fibroid. She ended up loosing a lot of blood and needed multiple blood transfusions, leading to a very tough recovery. After a year, Kimberly and her husband decided they wanted another baby and conceived right away. This pregnancy has been tough physically but normal and healthy with everything progressing very well. She's scheduled for a repeat cesarean in a couple of weeks if she doesn't go into labor on her own first. She had three doctors turn her down when she asked if she could attempt a VBAC and has had to resolve that while she didn't plan to have her babies this way, ultimately they get out of her body and she gets to keep them. She's developed fibroids with this pregnancy as well but they've stayed small and have not posed an issue. Kimberly was able to breastfeed Saoirse for 14 months and is excited to have that amazing, connective relationship again with the new baby.
Kayla Tumangday
The lovely Kayla Tumangday with 14 month old Henry Liam John. Kayla has Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS), endometriosis and fibroids on her uterus and was told that she wouldn't be able to get pregnant without assistance. After about 5 months of trying, Kayla and her husband were able to conceive without intervention. Sadly, she miscarried around 8 weeks. She wasn't trying any more and assumed that if she wasn't able to keep the pregnancy she wouldn't be able to have children. She got pregnant with Henry about 10 weeks later. Kayla was monitored closely with her pregnancy, she went through a lot of pain and ended up developing Type 2 diabetes and became insulin dependent. She started off at a low dose and ended up a very high dose that she has been weaning down from slowly as she has improved her health through diet and exercise. Regardless of her medical concerns, Kayla absolutely loved being pregnant and came to love herself and her body for the first time in her life. Her delivery started with an induction that didn't take and then a long labor that didn't progress beyond 4cm, resulting in an emergency cesarean birth. Henry was born with a genetic condition called ocular albinism rendering him legally blind. He is so far developing beautifully and hitting all of his milestones. Kayla and Henry had a difficult nursing relationship at the start, she pumped for his first 4 weeks, nursed with a shield from 4 to 13 weeks when he ripped the shield off and never looked back!