Andi Otto (38 - she/her). Mother of 8, photographed with her two living children aged 2 and 6 months.
Minneapolis, MN
My 6 angels consist of a set of 29 week twin girls, a 6 week twin girl and then the loss of her brother at 29 weeks, and another set of twins at 6 weeks. While 3 of them never showed a heartbeat their footprints will always be on mine. My son Noah is the little man who changed my world the most. Because of him we created a business to serve the loss community and I left the corporate world to become a doula.
How has parenthood impacted your body image?
I think it started long before parenthood when I realized that infertility was my reality. The countless treatments which of course resulted in hormone changes and weight gain. More surgeries than I can count on 2 hands. The deep depression that set in after each and every negative pregnancy test and then even further with each and every loss. I believed that my body couldn’t work right and didn’t work right, it was broken. I carried 2 pregnancies that gifted me with living breathing children but even then I didn’t trust my body through the whole 34 and 35 weeks I carried them. After I had them both they are my world and I don’t take care of myself like I should but when I look in the mirror I see all the scars that got them here, I see the weight that I gained that got them here, I see the breasts that fed one and still feed the other and without this body I wouldn’t have that.
What was your postpartum experience?
After my first living child I did amazingly well, I mean I had a living child everything I had ever wanted. My second however I struggled huge with postpartum anxiety, bled for 5.5 months, and has 2 surgeries ending in a hysterectomy. I honestly thought I wouldn’t ever have and postpartum problems just given my history so the PPA really threw me for a loop.
Why did you choose to participate in this movement and share your story?
As a doula I see so many birthing parents struggling with their bodies, me included. I’m here to try to see the beauty in myself and to show my kids to be proud of what your body is and what it can do. To show all my birthing parents that I practice what I preach.